Sunday, 31 March 2013

He left a Suicide Note!

Halo fabulous readers! Been a few days or rather weeks since I posted anything up here, yes, I know and deeply apologize to all those who keep asking me to come on and post something...rather bad that my cute readers have to do that but hey....things happen and sometimes 24hrs isnt just enough!
 Any ways this week was rather crazy especially at work, am soo glad its the Bank Holiday weekend and I get to just chill out, pamper maself, blog a bit more and take care of my own personal isshhh. I gat a verrry sad news that one of my Managers took his own life. It cut rather deep when the news was shared not particularly because I was super duper close to him or anything but whenever I hear that a grown ass person took their own life regardless of who they are or how close i was to them, it just dayum hurts! I start thinking well for you as an adult to take your own life away means that something must have been eating in sooo bad that you think your life is WORTHLESS and it hurts to think that some people get to a stage in their life where they feel that way. If you need to write this note to self please do..No life was ever created Worthless!We all have values and treasures in us albeit deeply hidden within us and perphap that is why we journey through this thing called LIFE--cause as you journey through it,, things happen that are infact meant to make you realize that there  is more to you than what you making do with!
As soon as I heard this new I just remember whispers of 'oh he was such a sweet guy, very caring, daring, etc etc which was all cool but in my head I just couldnt help but think that in this day and age NICENESS and GOODNESS alone dont CUT it! By that I mean if you have so much goodness in you and no foundation of hope or faith then sorryy its messed up. As a strong believer and Christian and lover of God (Yes you heard it and am a keep saying it Unapologetically!), its just way tooo wrong to deal with life issues, hurts and disappointments this way- Suicide. 
Personally to me it shows weakness and this is why if you are somebody who does not have any sort of Faith that anchors you as a person, an adult, somebody's wife,husband,baby,child,perphaps even someone people look up to then one day you gon crack and you gon crack real bad! When I also heard, first thing I said to my self was did I speak enough about my Faith, belief and God to him, did I make an effort to reach out and say something like...'oh do you go to church?, do you believe in anything?!Lol, that is always my chat up line by the way. I know how this helped quite a number of people I was opportuned to meet and who have said 'Sandra' just the way you carry yourself,hold on strong to your faith have made me learn to be strong and to fight harder through it all! And it wasnt that the saw me and just made such statement but that they have literally seen me walk through hurts&dissappointment etc.I have always said it doesnt matter if the person you speak to about your Faith and beliefs accepts them, as a matter of fact you dont talk to people about it and bug the hell outta them till they succumb and start goina church with you 24-7 or praying powerfully like you do, its always a gradual process, infact a veryyy gradual one. But I guess the main thing is that you u sow the seed of Faith and uncommon love! The kind of love that even men marvel at...I've heard someone say even my sister never shows me affection like you do and it shouldnt be but that is why we are different, a people of Faith and of a Religion (Christianity) that teaches otherwise! 
I also heard as part of my Manager's suicide death that he sought help but by the sound of things may not have received as much help as he wanted or maybe none at all...From friends and I suppose people he believed will have his back.Now I aint gonna sit by this computer and say I judge those he approached who couldnt help, perphaps they genuinely could not help and am sure they had the best intentions and probably never in their entire lives envisioned this! But one thing was sure for me and this prayer, I pray and will never stop praying..That the God that I serve will grant me strength to amass wealth that will solve not just my problem but problems of friends and even strangers, the wisdom to speak aright and offer the best of me and sound solutions to problems of friends and even strangers and most of all to love God so much that that Love will overflow unconditionally,sacrificially to all that come in contact with me that ever need help because I tell you one thing,, It definitely hurts to see someone suffer or die knowing that 'If' you had all of this perphaps they woulda still beeen around or not suffer with tears in their hearts!
Adieu JB!

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